Is a covert narcissist who has smeared your name and has no empathy dangerous since i went no contact and am keeping him from harrassing my dad
Executive summary
A covert narcissist who has smeared a name and lacks empathy can still be dangerous after no contact: the primary threats are reputational attacks, persistent harassment tactics (including “hoovering” and smear campaigns), and psychological harm to targets and their family; physical violence is possible in some cases but is not a guaranteed outcome and specific risk cannot be assessed from the available reporting [1] [2] [3]. Complete separation and careful documentation are repeatedly recommended by clinicians and survivor-writers because partial boundaries often fail with covert narcissists [2] [4].
1. Calculating the realistic threats: reputation, harassment, and emotional harm
Covert narcissists commonly respond to no contact by trying to control the narrative—through social media maneuvers, following/unfollowing, and spreading lies—to draw others into their frame and punish perceived rejection, making smear campaigns and ongoing reputational harm a central, documented risk [1] [5] [2]. Their tactics are typically subtle rather than overtly explosive; passive aggression, false empathy, guilt-tripping, and sewing doubt among family or mutual contacts are highlighted across clinical and survivor reporting as common post-no-contact strategies that can quietly damage relationships and mental health [2] [6] [7].
2. Persistence after cutting contact: hoovering and boundary tests
No contact often provokes escalation rather than immediate cessation: many sources describe “hoovering” attempts—emotional messages, apologies, victim narratives—designed to pull a person back in, and covert players tend to double down when ignored, meaning silence alone can trigger more creative or persistent outreach [5] [4] [8]. Experts and recovery communities therefore recommend firm, consistent boundaries because intermittent engagement or partial contact typically fails and can be exploited to reopen access [2] [4].
3. The danger to third parties — why protecting a parent matters
When a covert narcissist targets a parent or other family member, the danger shifts from private manipulation to collateral harm: smear campaigns and recruitment of allies are explicit tactics that can isolate or turn family members against each other, and covert tactics can create anxiety and trauma for the person being protected even without direct physical threats [1] [2] [6]. Sources advise limiting opportunities for the narcissist to access or communicate with vulnerable family members and maintaining clear, documented boundaries to reduce avenues for harassment [6] [3].
4. When to treat this as a legal/safety problem rather than a psychological one
The reporting emphasizes that covert narcissism is primarily a pattern of manipulation and emotional abuse, not a legal category; however, if harassment, stalking, threats, or doxxing occur, those are matters for law enforcement and civil remedies—document every contact, preserve messages, and consult police or an attorney when behavior crosses into illegal harassment or credible threats [3] [6]. The reviewed material does not provide statistical rates of escalation to physical violence, so individual threat assessment should rely on behavior evidence, prior threats, and professional safety planning [9].
5. Practical protective steps proven by clinicians and survivor guides
Recommended steps across mental-health and survivor sources are consistent: enforce absolute no contact (block channels), document and archive each incident, inform close contacts and your parent about the pattern so they can ignore bait, consider legal protections if harassment escalates, and engage therapy/support for trauma recovery—partial measures tend to be ineffective against persistent covert tactics [2] [6] [3]. These sources also stress preparing for reputational attacks by controlling one’s own narrative with trusted people and, where necessary, legal counsel [1] [5].
6. Limits of available reporting and final judgment
The available reporting robustly documents covert narcissists’ capacity for manipulation, smear campaigns, and emotional harm and consistently endorses no contact and documentation as protection strategies [1] [2] [7]. It does not provide definitive population-level odds that a given covert narcissist will become physically violent after no contact, so any conclusion about the likelihood of bodily harm requires direct, situation-specific evidence beyond these sources [9]. Given the documented tactics and persistence, treating the person as potentially dangerous in reputation and emotional harm terms—and preparing accordingly—is the prudent course supported by clinicians and survivor communities [2] [4].