Are there any notable examples of successful, long-term platonic relationships between men and women in history or popular culture?
Executive summary
Yes: both history and popular culture offer clear examples of long-running, nonsexual friendships between men and women, though scholars caution they are less visible and sometimes contested; classical thinkers shaped the idea of "platonic" love, modern research and media both document enduring cross-sex friendships and flag recurring tensions about desire and perception [1] [2] [3].
1. How the word and the doubt were born
The concept of "platonic" love traces back to Plato and later Renaissance reinterpretations that converted his philosophical Eros into a model of nonsexual affection, giving the modern term its philosophical pedigree [1]; simultaneously, prominent thinkers like Aristotle and Montaigne framed friendship as a virtuous, often male domain, which historically made mixed-sex friendships culturally marginal and suspicious [2] [4].
2. What the research and social science say about durability
Empirical studies and reviews show cross-sex friendships exist and in some cohorts are increasingly common—surveys once found younger adults were far more likely than elders to report opposite‑sex best friends, and contemporary scholarship argues that loosening gender norms has made enduring platonic ties more feasible—yet social perception problems persist, including evidence that men often overestimate women's romantic interest in them, complicating claims of "pure" platonic durability [2] [5] [3].
3. Real-life contemporary examples that lasted
Profiles and reporting offer named, long-term cases: a 46‑year‑old attorney described a friendship with a woman dating back to adolescence that remained nonsexual across decades, a concrete instance of a sustained platonic bond in adult life [5]; GQ and other outlets document men whose social circles are mostly women and who report stable, emotionally deep cross‑sex friendships, underscoring that durable platonic ties exist in the wild [6].
4. Historical and literary precedents that complicate the picture
Historians and literary critics point to friendships that were intensely intimate yet nonsexual by their societies' standards—romantic friendship as a historical category shows same‑sex and mixed examples with emotional depth but ambiguous sexual content, and literary pairings such as Clarissa and Richard in contemporary fiction or earlier confessor‑penitent stories illustrate how closeness can be framed as spiritual or moral rather than erotic [7] [8] [4].
5. Popular culture’s best evidence: sustained on‑screen platonic pairs
Film and television supply a rich trove of recognizable, long‑running platonic relationships—critics list pairs from Dorothy and her companions in The Wizard of Oz to Steve and Robin on Stranger Things and workplace duos like Don and Peggy on Mad Men—these screen relationships model how nonromantic intimacy can be written and maintained over years, even while the medium often converts friends into lovers for drama [9] [10] [11].
6. The limiting facts and the counterargument
Skeptics and many studies emphasize two limits: one, the prevalence of attraction or unvoiced desire in some friendships means not every labeled "platonic" tie lacks romantic undercurrents; two, cultural visibility skews perception—romance sells better in narrative and scholarship, so public examples of durable platonic men‑women friendships are underrepresented even if common in everyday life [12] [13] [3].
7. Bottom line for the question of "notable examples"
There are notable, verifiable examples across domains: named contemporary friendships reported in longform journalism, well‑documented media pairings that remain nonsexual across seasons or decades, and historical/literary models of intense nonerotic companionship; at the same time, scholars and critics warn that some anecdotes mask unreciprocated desire or later romanticization, so each candidate requires scrutiny rather than blanket acceptance [5] [9] [8] [3].