What role does relationship status (single, dating, married, divorced) play in shaping women's sexual fantasies?

1. Relationship status appears in both clinical studies and popular accounts

Academic instruments such as the Sexual Desire and Erotic Fantasies questionnaire (SDEF2) explicitly use "being in a relationship" as a covariate, and report that relationship status helps differentiate fantasy-related scores and sexual functioning measures — meaning relationship status is treated as an explanatory variable in scientific work ^[3]. Popular outlets and books that collected letters from women likewise recorded relationship status alongside age and income, signalling that writers and researchers see status as a meaningful descriptor when analyzing fantasies ^[4].

2. Long‑term relationships: boredom, novelty and romantic content

Multiple sources link longer partnerships to fantasies that address boredom or seek novelty and intimacy: relationship experts quoted in magazine pieces say fantasies about someone known (or romantic scenarios) often arise because long‑term partners are familiar and desire needs novelty or emotional connection ^{[1] [2]}. Research summaries also note a positive relationship between fantasies and subjective sexual satisfaction, which suggests fantasies in relationships often serve to maintain desire and satisfaction rather than to signal dissatisfaction alone ^[5].

3. Single and dating women: novelty, multi‑partner and exploration themes

Reporting and surveys indicate that fantasies emphasizing adventure, strangers, or multi‑partner scenarios are common and can be more prominent when people are single or seeking novelty; popular health writing highlights that fantasies of novelty or trying new activities produce adrenaline and arousal, dynamics that single or newly dating women may seek for stimulation ^{[2] [1]}. Media lists of common fantasies repeatedly include group sex, threesomes, and non‑monogamy themes — topics that writers note are frequent regardless of relationship status but are often framed as expressions of curiosity or a desire for novelty ^{[6] [7]}.

4. Non‑monogamy and fantasies: a shifting social frame

Several outlets emphasize that fantasies about open relationships, swinging, or polyamory are widespread and increasingly visible; outlets frame these fantasies as sometimes reflecting genuine interest in non‑monogamy and sometimes as purely masturbatory scenarios for people in monogamous relationships ^{[2] [7]}. This signals that relationship status does not map neatly onto fantasy content — monogamous partnered women can and do fantasize about consensual non‑monogamy just as single women may fantasize about committed romance ^[2].

5. Sexual orientation and other factors interact with relationship status

Research shows that orientation and other demographics modulate fantasy types: for instance, lesbian women in one study scored higher on transgressive fantasies and lower on romantic ones, and researchers caution that such patterns may reflect openness, past experience, or relationship status rather than orientation alone ^[8]. In other words, relationship status is one factor among age, sexual orientation, past sexual history, and socialization that shapes fantasy content ^{[8] [5]}.

6. Measurement caveats and self‑report limits

Scholars and journalists repeatedly note limits: many studies rely on self‑selected or self‑report samples, and women may underreport certain fantasies because of shame or because their arousal is less explicitly labeled as fantasy ^{[4] [9]}. The SDEF2 validation work pointedly controls for social desirability and relationship covariates, demonstrating that interpreting status effects requires careful statistical adjustment ^[3].

7. Competing interpretations: function vs. pathology

Sources converge that fantasies are typically healthy and functional (maintaining desire, exploring identity), but they also highlight different readings: clinical voices stress fantasies are normal unless they cause distress or harm; popular pieces emphasize playful experimentation and communication with partners when translating fantasies into action ^{[4] [6]}. Thus relationship status may be framed either as context for adaptive fantasy use (keeping desire alive) or as a site where fantasies reveal unmet needs — both interpretations appear in the reporting ^{[1] [2]}.

8. Practical takeaway for readers and partners

If you want to understand or discuss fantasies across relationship statuses, sources advise treating fantasies as common and often functional, communicating openly if you consider acting on them, and recognizing that relationship status shapes—but does not determine—fantasy content; many partnered women report fantasies about others while remaining satisfied with their relationships ^{[10] [2]}.

Limitations: available sources are a mix of peer‑reviewed validation studies and popular media; the provided materials do not offer a single large, representative longitudinal study that definitively maps how being single, dating, married, or divorced causally changes fantasies over time — those specific causal claims are not found in current reporting ^{[3] [5]}.